I met a guy called John down the boozer the other day. He had some boring office job and among other things he told me he had to do the work risk assessments. John insisted this was very useful because being single he could also apply the risk assessment formula to his love life. So before embarking on affairs with any of the dolly birds at work, John did risk assessments on these women. He ruled out single women because there was too great a risk of them ending up wanting to get married to him. With married babes he’d work out the risk of them getting caught out by their husbands, who might proceed to beat him black and blue if they found out what he was doing with their missus. And he’d continue to figure out all the risks right down to the chances of catching the clap. In the end he told me illicit love always came out as too risky, so he just stuck to his drinking and was happy with it.